It's rare that I feel angry. But today I feel furious.

We have been promised almost daily since my arrival that "tomorrow" we will have word from the ethics committee here to get approval for this study to proceed.  I've gotten a lot of "don't call us, we'll call you" - when I keep bothering the poor secretary.  So today I called again, a bit more desperate, and asked to speak to the head of the committee. She explained that we wouldn't be reviewed until the end of the month? 

WHAT?? 

JUNE 30? 

That will add up to a month of waiting.

She has to be kidding.

There was one caveat. We could pay 2.5 million Kwatcha (about $800) to organize an expedited meeting that could be called in a day.  

Here, I have found out, officials are paid a "sitting fee" for each meeting that they attend. People in lots of health organizations  are impossible to get in touch with because they are always in meetings. And now I see why - what a supplemental income strategy.

So my project has been sucked into this fiasco.  It is possibly a combination of a miss-communication (the secretary hoping it would be passed, so she led me on in a way), the huge wall of bureaucracy with a hint of corruption peering through the silver walls...

I am trying to spin this in my head as a cross cultural experience (yes, thanks mom).  Perhaps it is a different sense of time,  a lack of a sense of urgency. I joke with people here that there is "Zambian time" and "America Time" when we call a meeting. A 9am meeting in Zambian time means between 10 and 10:30. In general, people here have been nothing but generous.  However, in this situation, I feel like I want to pull out my hair.

In the end it leaves me feeling like I want to cry.  I am here. Now. I would love to get this thing off the ground.  We are trying to circumvent this by talking to people with power. At this point, my fingers can only be crossed  - that, or I (or the organization I'm working with) can cough up $800. Or, I could think of a fun plan to do for the next few weeks and take off for greener pastures.

Oy.